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0 (1s): Hello, and welcome to the how to choose happiness and freedom show. I'm your host Lauren Foster happiness teacher, and founder of be happy first as a certified life mastery consultant, masters of wisdom and meditation teacher and primal health coach. I'm on a mission to help 1 million women learn to be happy and free on purpose, healthy, wealthy, and joyfully living life on your own terms. Happiness is a choice and you can always choose to be happy first. Thanks so much for being here now on to today's episode. 1 (35s): All right. I'm so happy to have with me, my new friend from across the pond in the UK, they keep her on his personal trainer. She's a coach. She's an online coach. She's a speaker, and she has her own podcast that we're going to share with you, how to listen to called the lift that now podcast. Welcome Vicki. 2 (56s): Hello. Thank you so much for having me Laura. And I can't wait for this conversation because we had such a good one a couple of weeks back. 1 (1m 2s): Yeah, we did. It's. My mission is to find likeminded people who are empowering people, especially women to live life on their own terms. And that is so much easier to do when you're walking around in a body that feels good. And your relationship with your body is so very important. So our loose theme for July is all about this physical earth suit that we're wearing. So tell, tell us about you, Vicky, what what's, what's Vicki Brown all about and why did you become a personal trainer? 2 (1m 36s): Well, it's quite a story. I guess I have constantly evolved to the point where I am now. And actually I was going down a path of having a law career that was kind of bad. I could see my, my life going and during my AP level year. Okay. Back a little bit. I actually got really sick and it completely changed the way I considered the need to look after myself. So I kind of had that pivotal moment that made me think, right. I need to actually look after myself so that I can be well for the rest of my life. 2 (2m 10s): I now give myself the best shot to getting better. So it all happened in one moment, I decided to join gym and I wanted to look after myself and I caught a bug. I was never particularly into fitness when I was a kid. So it wasn't like I was that sporty kid. I liked swimming, but that was about as far as it went. And I joined gym. I found a type of exercise that I really enjoyed and I enjoyed lifting off myself. And I guess it's just been a learning process ever since. So I decided to train as a personal trainer. 2 (2m 41s): So that was kind of my first and probably what I spend most of my time doing now. I love to help other people. So basically I caught the bug and I thought, well, I found something that I love. I want to help other people have this door open for them. So my biggest focus when it comes to training people is lifting weights. I just adore weights. And I think it is something that is genuinely for everybody. We will have to find our own starting point and build our foundation, but to have a strong body is so important. 2 (3m 13s): And it was, as I say, a development. So I, it was just kind of opened the door and the more and more I got into it, the more you come to realize how you realize, how your body reacts, it feels differently. And the more people I worked with, I realized how disconnected with himself to be with our bodies. So for me, it's become a journey of reconnecting with my own body, but actually helping others connect with theirs. And I guess that's one of the main reasons I started. 2 (3m 43s): The podcast is a great way of speaking to lots of other likeminded people, people with different holistic backgrounds and helping more people because it's, it's about educating and empowering. Cause we have the power to change the quality of our lives and we just need a little bit of help helping us to do that. 1 (4m 2s): Okay. So I feel like there is a conception out there that lifting weights is all about bodybuilding and building, you know, having that muscular physique that you see on bodybuilders, but you and I know that there are way more benefits. So, but tell our audience what those benefits are. 2 (4m 23s): Yeah, you're so right. And you know, and particularly women, there is this massive misconception and the amount of times, honestly, I'll be a multimillionaire. If the amount of times that I've been asked all, but I don't want to get too big or, you know, I'm worried about getting too big. And honestly, the truth is it's really, really hard to build muscle. Particularly with women, we don't have as masculine a much testosterone in our bodies and we build muscle at a very, very slow rate, which actually on one hand is quite frustrating once you get into it. But the truth is it's hard, but that is not, that is not a bad thing. 2 (4m 56s): That's just the thing is often the fear of stopping people doing it. So that fear is gone. Honestly, it's very difficult to do. The second one is the fact is our bodies, how we live our day to day life. And if it's not strong and it doesn't know how to work, we sit so often and our bodies and our muscles are not strong of the body. The bones are not being given the resistance and the force that they need. Our muscles do not know how or cannot support our bodies properly. 2 (5m 29s): And particularly as we age or what, with a lot of people over the age of 40, unfortunately I must've started to deteriorate. So the day to day stuff can actually start to get more difficult. You start to get the aches and pains, the back pains, the neck pains, all the different things. Everyone has their own experience, but we all have the power to start where we are. You know, we don't wanna dive too far in, you've got to start from your foundation, but build ourselves up. And it can and have worked with many people that they have felt the strongest they ever have because they've never worked up their body in that way. 2 (6m 5s): And that body has that support. And yes, a lot of people want to look better. Wipes definitely does that for you. It tightens up the skin and it makes you start feeling more defined and toned, but ultimately it makes you feel stronger. Your posture improves things in life, become easier. The things you do just day to day become easier. And this whole concept of aging doesn't need to be accepted. We can do things for as long as we want my oldest clients, 82. 2 (6m 37s): And it's phenomenal. You know, there's never, there's never a time you need to stop. You just need to figure out how to do it for you at that time. 1 (6m 46s): That's awesome. I love that. He said that. And that's, you know, one of the things that I'm going to be 55 in August and a lot of my age group are just like, Oh, well of course my joints hurt. Of course I'm overweight. Of course I have wrinkles because I'm, I'm about to be 55 years old. I'm like, no, that is not the truth. That the, you can be healthy and vital and strong and beautiful your whole entire life. So I really want to dispel that notion that, you know, eight getting sick and feeble is inevitable because it's not. 1 (7m 21s): And I want to pull the confidence part out of what you just said in that there is a, there is a confidence in putting your body to a test and your body does what you asked it to do, and you see your strength building. And this is a very hands on way of showing yourself that you are a powerful creator in this world and that your body wants to work with you. If you will give it the right input in the right stuck. Right? 2 (7m 52s): Yeah. It's so true. And now I will often have people say to me, no, I can't lift that. I can't do that much weight. No, that's not. And I wouldn't be getting them to do it. If I, I knew that they couldn't do it because their head is telling them, no, I can't do that. I can't do that. But then it's like a light bulb moment. They've done it. They know they're stronger than they thought they were. And they start to learn how much more you can push yourself. And then, you know, having something so basic, it's a very basic thing to do, but to be able to move heavy things makes you realize you can do more. 2 (8m 23s): So it's an empowerment that can actually knock onto the rest of your life. And that is so powerful because it really can affect anything. It's a state of mind and the stronger your body gets, the stronger your mind gets and it just knocks on and it all comes together. And the truth is coming back to the age thing. I have people that are stronger, I can and can do more and have more self-belief than people. Half their age, age is not necessarily a sign of fitness or strength in any as so many 1 (8m 56s): Factors. And yes, as you age and learn a little bit more recovery time and maybe a few factors to take in, but ultimately there is no need to think, Oh, I'm old. I don't need to do that. Or I shouldn't do that. Or I can't do that because you absolutely can. Right? It's never too late to stop. That's right. We get to be happy and free our whole life. There's not a limit that there's no law that says, Oh, you only have 35 years of being happy and free and fed and beautiful than the rest of your life is something else. So, and I love how you're, you're leaving the life lesson. 1 (9m 28s): And there is, don't say can't can't is a very disempowering word. And a lot of times we're saying that about things we don't know, we haven't tried, you know, or something we haven't yet learned how to do. Okay. So hear that. So I'm a primal health coach. And so our basis of how physical movement is, well, for one thing, we want to abolish the, what do we call it? We call it the fit couch potato, that the person that faithfully goes to the gym for an hour every day, but they spend 13 hours sitting in front of the computer, sitting in front of the TV. 1 (10m 8s): And so we, one of our first premises is to build movement into your day so that you're not just, you're not being still at the time. And it, I don't know who said it first, but sitting is the new smoking is, you know, kind of a thing. So, so I have different work areas. I have standup workstations. I have, I have sitting on the floor workstations and just getting your body in different positions and going for a walk. So that's the first premise. And then the second is to have low intensity cardio that, that the high intensity sustained chronic cardio is unnecessary stress for your body. 1 (10m 47s): But so our ancestors did a lot of blocking getting to food, getting to, you know, a new location for their home. So going for a long walk every day, doing anything, that's, that's getting your heart rate up a little, not racing, not at your maximum, just, you know, up there in the mid range. And then two, three times a week lift heavy things. Yup, yup. That which can look like a whole bunch of different things. And then, so those are the pretty much the must, do's the basics. 1 (11m 19s): And then if you feel like it, and you think that you can't put some sprints in there some little short, high intensity intervals, and then so that's very broad, but then within that is very individual. And so here's my question for you. How do I, and, or my listeners, or both, how do we discover what types of exercise, weightlifting, strength, training, whatever is right for us and keep in mind that I also want everything to be as fun as possible and, and easy and free 2 (11m 54s): Flowing and the no pain, no gain thing. I think that pretty should be abolished from the language. Well, I absolutely loved what you were saying and I completely agree in, and actually I think there's quite a misconception about what a personal trainer is. And perhaps I take that as a personal thing. Perhaps there are personal trainers that fit into that stereotype that you might think of. But the truth is the way I work with people is you have to look at overall lifestyle. 2 (12m 27s): So all those things that you were just saying is absolutely right. We need to move more. We have become an incredibly sedentary society and it's not good for us. We're not made to sit, you know, I, I have barefoot shoes. I want to allow our bodies to work as much as possible sitting on the floor, all of that stuff. It's so important. And I actually think it's really important to just try things. And that might involve getting a coach because of course, something like lifting weights, you might be a little bit nervous or, you know, there's a lot of people that aren't confident enough or don't want to walk into the weights area of Virginia. 2 (13m 6s): And I completely understand that if I had to a new gym, it's always a bit daunting. You've got to figure out how to use the equipment. And I know what I'm doing now. I know how to do all the moves, but it's still, I can understand how much it's a no go for people. So I guess I would say, if you want to try weights in some way, if you can take some time to invest in some sort of coach to, for an hour or two, to show you the basics that you know, how to safely execute the moves, you need to have some sort of program to follow so that you can again do it long enough for every four or five weeks to actually give it a good go and see if it's for you. 2 (13m 47s): And there are so many different ways to resistance train as well. You know, some people love body weights. Some people love dumbbells and barbells. I'm a big fan. The rule of kettlebells, there are lots of ways of doing it. And I think the best way of finding out is to just try. And I've had people come to me and they've been like, Oh, I hate exercise. They're still coming to me. Cause they think, I know I've got to do something. I need to look after myself, but I hate exercise. So they're basically saying good luck. You know, I'm not really wanting to be here, but I'm here nonetheless. 2 (14m 19s): And they a few weeks later, okay, I love this. I found a type of training that I actually enjoy because it feels different. You know, the how it's the way it feels difficult is so different from cardio. So if you tried running and you're like, Oh, I hate running it's so the opposite. Just give it a try. As I say, when I first started, I wasn't super sporting, like this was just inevitable for me to get into this. It wasn't, it was quite the opposite. I found a different way of moving my body that I liked. 2 (14m 50s): So getting a little bit of professional advice, to be able to show you the basics, to give you the confidence that then ultimately you can do it in so many different ways. You might want to join a class. You may want to join a gym or it's very easy. And I think people have realized even more during lockdown, you can actually do a hell of a lot at home. You can get some very basic equipment and you can do some really good walkouts at home. And not only is that going to be a great time saver, it's easier to do. You can do it in the comfort of your own home. 2 (15m 21s): Like you're getting looked at. I know self-conscious feelings often a thing again, that puts you off gyms. So it's making it easy. It's trying a few different ways to see what works for you, but rarely do I get the feedback that people don't like the way they feel, because within a couple of sessions, you just feel a bit different. You start standing a little bit different. You start sitting a little bit different. You start enjoying that little bit of achy gait. You think, wow, I can feel my muscles muscles start to wake up like, Oh, I didn't even know how to muscle there. 2 (15m 52s): And you know, it's, it's quite exciting. It can be an exciting period. But all I would say is just give it a, go get a little bit of advice and don't feel you necessarily have to go to a gym. 1 (16m 4s): You're very inspiring. I wish that you were in the United States, so you could be mine. Okay. So here's, and again, I am educated on certified. I have a lot of knowledge and I have even figured out ways that, you know, we talked about movement and, but I'm still challenged with getting myself to do this. Even though I have found, I go live to go for long walks with my dog out in the woods. 1 (16m 36s): And yet I still don't what, what are some secrets and some tricks. And a lot of times people will get a scary diagnosis or something really hurts or something. And this gives them the, Oh, huh? I better do something. Yes. But I don't think we should have to wait to get sick. You know? So how can those of us who don't have anything scary to motivate us? 1 (17m 6s): How can we get started and get moving? And what are, what, what's your advice about that? 2 (17m 12s): Yeah. I love this question because actually that is exactly it. My passion is to inspire and educate people to take care of themselves. So they don't get sick, not waiting until you do, because you know, we don't want to get that pivotal moment. We need to make it easy. And I think we need to find some joy in it. So in fact, I think the thing that makes it a bit easier is if you do start with the small things, rather than thinking, Oh, I've got to come to a hit class. I mean, that's how vendors, if you've not worked out for years, walking into a hit class for 99% of people would just destroy them and they're gonna get much joy from it. 2 (17m 51s): And they're probably not want to go, going to want to go back. So I think stopped interval training when she said, yes, definitely. I know it's the jargon. You don't even think about it. So, I mean like was, I have a dog and I just love walking. And I think walking is a really good place to start, but like anything, I actually think it's trying to make it a habit a part of your day and becoming aware of how it makes you feel. 2 (18m 22s): So I love to start my day, taking my dog out, going into the fields, getting some fresh air. And I just feel so much more refreshed and ready for the day, but that may even be too much for some people. So even smaller things can make a difference. So when you go and park up, if you're going to the shops, for example, when things are normal, you can park just a little bit further away. If you take the bus or a train, if you can stop the station early, and then you could just walk a little bit further bother than getting in the lift at work, go up the stairs. 2 (18m 58s): Now it may sound like, well, that's barely going to make a difference, but it starts to change your mindset. And if you think of all the times, you go in the lift in over a whole week, that can add up to a lot and you just start to feel different and you start to become aware of how you feel. And if you start taking the stairs and your aching, or you get out of puff, not need to take a break. That in itself can be that little bit of motivation that makes you think, wow, I actually need to take care of myself. 2 (19m 28s): I should be able to walk up the stairs. That should be easy. I used to race up and down when I was a kid, but if you never really pay attention, it's very difficult. So I would honestly say the first thing to do is try and do the small things that will just start to move you more. And then the second part, I guess, is trying to figure out how you can make these things are habits. And a lot of the proven methods behind habit building is linking one habit with something else. So let me give you a couple of examples, particularly as you start to get older balance can become an issue. 2 (20m 5s): So a really good thing for us to be able to do is to be able to stand on one leg. Now, what is something we do every day? We all brush our teeth. So when you were brushing your teeth, you could practice standing on my leg. And the good thing is your bathroom hustle. You could hold on to, if you asked it a little bit wobbly. So by putting it with something you do every day, you're more likely to do it. Perhaps you have a cup of tea or coffee, so you put the cattle on or put your coffee machine on. We do that every single morning. Perhaps you could do five squats while you wait. 2 (20m 35s): If you can link it with something that you're already doing, you're much more likely to do it. If you've got non-negotiables in the day, what could you knock onto that? That will become an autopilot habit? Because I think quite often, you'll just kind of think, okay, I want to do this. And then it'll just kind of be plunked randomly in the day somewhere, but you need a trigger. You need to make it really easy to actually implement and do it. And there again, only tiny, but if you do five squats every day, that's a lot of squats of the week and it just makes you more self aware of your body. 2 (21m 11s): So I think that that really helped. 1 (21m 13s): Yeah. That's 35 squats over the week, 2 (21m 16s): Which, and then eventually you ended up doing more. Once you start, 1 (21m 20s): Right? It's like, Oh, this is all right. This, this feels good. This feels awesome. Right. And I think you're right. It's all about the getting started and getting yourself to feel the results and, you know, adapting your mindset. I thought of something while you were talking. And then of course it just dashed right out of my mind. Oh, communication with your body, your relationship with your body. We, we, this is kind of a double edge type of thing. 1 (21m 50s): For one thing. I want us to stop thinking of ourselves as this body. We are not this body. We have this body, this is something that we're walking around. And so not having your self esteem tied up in, you know, your weight or your health or any of that. And, you know, just understanding that that's completely separate and then being loving and kind, and respectful and friendly with your body. We, we beat ourselves up, you know, or like trying to beat ourselves into shape and depriving ourselves with, you know, crazy funky diets and, you know, criticizing being mean. 1 (22m 28s): So what, what are some, what are some ways that you use to help people be more loving to themselves in the more loving to their bodies? 2 (22m 38s): Well, I think one of the most common things that I have to do is people, as you say, talk horribly to themselves in such a way, they've never talked to someone else. And I know these people quite well and they would never say it about another person. The things they say to themselves are horrible. And I just, I literally say stop. It's like probably my most hard time of session. I'm like, no stop, stop. You're not allowed to say that because if you keep saying that you're believing it and you're being cool to yourself, and that is not going to get you anywhere. 2 (23m 10s): Being cruel is not going to start making you make better choices and looking after yourself, which is what you need to have self care. And I had a great phrase. Actually, you reminded me when you started that question. People will say, I am fat, but I had a great phrase saying I have fat and it's true. It's not an identity. You are not. And entire fat is, it's just impossible. It's, that's not a thing you happen to have fat. You may have more fat than you want to have. 2 (23m 40s): And that's fine. There's nothing wrong with striving to be healthier and feel better about if that's the thing that you want to work towards. That is fine. You know, positive focusing goals is a good thing, but you can say things in a kind way. And I think one of the reasons I love whites is that 3 (24m 2s): Okay, 2 (24m 2s): You realize you're stronger than you think you are. And it starts you to be a little bit more positive to yourself about yourself. And then you can, you can tell yourself, I am stronger than I thought I am. I can lift that heavy weight and I'm going to lift whatever that heavier weight might be. You start setting goals for yourself. You want be able to do body weight exercises. You want to be able to lift X number of pounds. And that's exciting. And I think that's one of the things that draws people into weights as well. 2 (24m 33s): It's a very quick empowerment to realize you can do more than you think you can. And then you can do more things in the garden at home and in the house that makes you feel good, little wins like that makes you feel immediately good. And the other reason I love weights, but typically the way I train, I guess you would say in a lot of ways, I train people in a bodybuilding style. That's because it's a very safe way of training because actually, you know, I have to have people with injuries and stuff over the years, and sometimes you need to stop. 2 (25m 7s): And if you're fully in control of movement, if something doesn't feel quite right, you can stop and you can figure out what it is. And I will get someone to do an exercise and I will try and teach their mind muscle connection. And that allows them to realize what muscles they're trying to feel and use. Whilst they're doing an exercise. Now, sometimes you're just build the muscles you want. And other times other muscles will start kicking in and you start to realize that actually, our bodies are amazing. 2 (25m 38s): If you, if we wanted to do something, it will figure out a way to get it done, but it may not be the way we want to do it. It may not be the safest way of doing it. Particularly if we have weak muscles, which is very normal, you know, we're often unbalanced, there are little things that are weaker than others, muscles that are strong, keep trying to take over. So getting that mind, muscle connection, understanding what you're trying to do when you're doing a movement actually allows you to start reconnecting, potentially connecting with parts of the body that you've literally paid no attention to. 2 (26m 12s): You have no idea what it does. The backpacking is often the case until you get an injury, people completely ignore that. That's often the case. What hurts it's becomes the, you know, there's the sense of focus, but we want to get in there before that. We want you to have a strong back, you know, how to work and strengthen and engage and feel. And perhaps you pick up on things because you stop listening to your body and you say, Ooh, that doesn't feel quite like, maybe I need to go to professional and get that checked out. 2 (26m 44s): That's not how it should be feeling. And you get in there early, you know, you can sort the problem out without escalating to a massive issue. So I just, I love waits for allowing people to start focusing in on what their body is, how it works, what it can do for you. I just think it wakes you up in so many different, different ways. 1 (27m 7s): Yeah. The re re opens reestablishes communication between you and these at different parts of your body. And, you know, you said something so important there. That is, we say all the time that the two most powerful words in the world are I am. And everything that follows after that has so much impact. So w w you would never want to say, I am fat. I am stupid. I'm broke. I am, you know, all of this things that, just that simple shift. And then I can also see how, when you are teaching people to have this different feeling about themselves in their body, with their, with their strength, then suddenly that that becomes a decision making thing. 1 (27m 48s): So this person that has this kind of strength would make this kind of choice instead of this kind of choice. So I'm going to have some ice water instead of a Coke, because that's what this person would do. And so you, you begin to learn better ways of being just as a result of that catalyzing activity of getting stronger. I love it. It's 2 (28m 14s): Yeah, I think so much good and bad is wrapped up in identity. I think identity can very much limits us. I think identity can also make us do things they're not necessarily a bad thing, but I think often we will get stuck in identity. Whereas actually we have a very long life. We do very many different things, and we may come into contact with lots of different people and have so many different experiences. We may no longer belong to identity, but I don't think we're often very good at letting go of one in order to be able to draw on and accept a new one, because actually we're going to evolve. 2 (28m 57s): You know, there might be some strands that go through our whole lives, maybe, perhaps who knows, but, well, we'll find out at the end, but it's very likely that most of our identities will evolve. And I think it's important to let go of some and allow new ones in order to have a fulfilling life and allow ourselves to sort of live too awful. 1 (29m 22s): Yeah. To let go of limiting beliefs and the choir new more empowering one go. I love it. Love it, love it. Okay. So Vicky, do you, she has the lift fit now podcast, and we're going to share the link to that with you. And we'll also share her email address if you want to reach out to her and get more information, especially if you, well, you know, she's an online coach, so you don't have to be in the UK. You don't have to be in Europe. You can, you can be in the United States or Australia or anywhere in the world. So this global community, any questions people have, please do just get in touch. 1 (29m 58s): Okay, cool. So checking the comments here real quickly. I don't see any questions. All right. Is there anything that you want to add before we wrap it up for the day? Well, I will just say I haven't let you know yet, but I launched our podcast conversation today so people can hear what you had to say. I was a guest. We said, this is our third conversation and they're all this stuff in my head. So yeah. Go and check out my episode of the lipid now podcast and hang around and listen to the other experts too. 1 (30m 31s): Alright. Awesome. Vicky, thank you so much for joining me. We're going to stay in touch. I'm very happy that I know you and I'm going to come and visit you because you live in <inaudible> mountain. Maybe we'll have our own well we'll we'll visit each other, but then maybe we'll swap like, like great idea. All right. Awesome. We're going to be back here on Tuesday with another great guest in the meantime, have a wonderful rest of the week and an awesome weekend. 1 (31m 4s): And remember that happiness is a choice and you can always choose to be happy first.
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